Wednesday, March 21, 2012

So This is What My Life Has Come To

Today...........Where do I begin?

Today was a DAY. A long day full of poop, throw up, and boogers.
Wednesdays are a stay-at-home-Mom day. Lawson usually has 3Pre-K but since it is spring break and we had such  a long night, he stayed home as well.
I will now list some of the thoughts that popped into my head today randomly.
Disclaimer: I am not responsible for any damage and/or trauma you may gain from reading this. My thoughts can be kind of scary.
Consider yourself warned........

Whoever invented Boogie Wipes is a freakin' genius

Is it THAT bad if I let my toddler eat a mix of Ritz, Nilla Wafers, and Cheese Puffs for lunch? I mean Cheese Puffs do have cheese in them, that is one of the food groups

When did I start considering it a good day if I didn't get thrown up on, peed on, or pooped on?

Just how much snot can one tiny little nose contain? Jeez!

When will my Husband be home? (While looking out the window every 2 minutes)

Who knew that a 3 year old could work a Kindle better than I can?

How did that giant puddle of liquid on the floor in the hall get there? What is it?

Why is the half of a Nilla Wafer I just stuck in my mouth SO soggy?
I said this out loud, to which Lawson replied that he and Baby Brother were sharing and that Baby Brother sucked on it and then put it back in the box. Great.

How many times will I have to clean up throw up today?

If I have to hear the Bubble Guppies theme song one more time I may scream.

Since when did ramping a culvert get to be such a big deal? I mean, I didn't get stuck or anything.

It can't be good to drink so much coffee that you are shaking, can it?

Drinking a glass of wine following a run is considered rehydrating right? I mean it is fluid.

Maybe if I don't eat lunch I can even out all the calories I have consumed before lunch  through Coke, coffee with lots of sugar, and  straight-out-of-the-box Lucky Charms.

Running a half mile and then walking the other half is almost running the whole thing, right?!
(Sadly, I know this is not at all true, but I had to make myself feel better at the time)

(While looking in the bathroom mirror) Hey, that new eye brightener and concealer I bought at Ulta really covers those lemur-like circles around my eyes. Yes!

(After getting into my car and looking in the rearview mirror) Crap! That new eye brightener and concealer I just bought at Ulta really does NOT cover up those lemur-like circles around my eyes. Sigh...I am not sure that anything short of a mask can cover those bad boys.

That 3 mile half run/walk means I can eat pepperoni pizza and drink coke, right?

While thinking about all I have eaten today: No wonder I can't lose that last 8 pounds.


These are just a sample of my random thoughts over the course of the day. I have forgotten many. Maybe I should start writing them down. Hmmmm......

Oh, I guess I better fill y'all in on the whole culvert ramping one, huh? It was a part of my day that made it a little interesting and provided quite a few people with some laughs. (Yes, I am talking about you Mike, Brent, Jessie, and Nikki :)

While I was out running errands today at lunch I jumped the culvert between McGraw-Webb's used lot and Travis's. I really did not even give it another thought until Jessie called me about it. She was checking to make sure my car was OK. I didn't even know what she was talking about. I think I may have asked Why? Then said something to the extent of I didn't have a wreck. Not too sure about the details. Jessie, you may have to help fill me in. I was quite confused about why this was even being asked. She then said that she had heard I jumped the culvert. Oh, yeah, I did. I told her it wasn't a big deal, I had not even remembered doing it. The reason I accidentally ran off into the culvert was because I remembered I had to go to The Pig and had just passed it so I quickly whipped into the used lot to do the loop around through Travis's. While turning  in on two wheels, my drink tipped over and I quickly looked down at it and ran right into the culvert.  (Don't worry guys, the babies were NOT in the car with me :) It didn't even slow me down, though. I just kept on trucking, bouncing right along. It did make a pretty awful noise though. So I park at Travis's, run around the passenger side to pick up my drink and head on over to The Pig to get some much needed Ritz crackers and bananas. I didn't even give it a second thought.

So when Jessie already had heard about it and called me about it, I was pretty surprised. I know word travels fast in Camden but sheesh! Turns out Mike and Brent at SAG saw the whole thing and told Jessie about it. Apparently most people who run into it get stuck and damage their car. Hmmm, I must be a good driver ;)

My car did not get any damage from running in the culvert....
My cup runneth over!

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