Friday, April 13, 2012

Yeah, that just happened

I wish I could have sat down and typed this post out last night after returning from Prattville at 11 o'clock at night. I was extremely riled up about the events of the day and have since probably forgotten several details of extreme importance. Unfortunately, I had to get Garrison ready for bed, give him medicine, get him to sleep, unload everything from the car, unload and load the dishwasher, sweep the living room, and clean up an enormous pile of cheerios that were all over the bathroom floor from Garrison earlier that morning. (Whatever it takes to keep them entertained so moms can actually shower, right?) Apparently my dear Hubby either never went into our  bathroom yesterday after returning home from work and before bed or he just chose to ignore them. I would have to put money on the latter because I am pretty sure he got a shower when he got home.
I wonder if he even questioned the Cheerio explosion or if he just stepped around, over, and on top of  it and just kept on trucking?

I will go ahead and issue my standard warning now....

This post will graphically describe Garrison's throw-up episode. I will spare no detail. It was kind of rough.....(As a side note, I am becoming more and more concerned about the number of my posts that  start with a warning and/or disclaimer. )

Yesterday Garrison had to go back to see the pediatrician about his ears. After 10 days of antibiotic ear drops, his ears were no better. They were and are still draining and he is extremely congested and coughing. So we load up and head back to Prattville, where I had just been on Monday for Lawson's Dr appointment.Garrison cried the entire way there. It was only slightly nerve wrecking.
Somehow I managed to get to Prattville early so we ran into Hobby Lobby. I had a whole list of things I needed to get for Garrison's birthday party so we took our time looking at everything. At 20 minutes until appointment time I head to the register where I am the last in a very, very long line. That is one of my pet peeves with my beloved Hobby Lobby. They are like Wal-Mart, only one register open and 20 people in line. Plus the clerks are usually as slow as cold molasses when it comes to ringing everything up. Especially if something needs to be wrapped in newspaper to keep from breaking. If you are at all in any kind of a hurry do not attempt to buy anything breakable. You WILL be late. Knowing there was no way I could pay and still make it to the doctor's office on time, I ask an employee if I can leave my full basket and come back after the appointment to get it all. Sure, no problem. Off we go.
 We see Dr. M and it is confirmed that GW's ears look awful and are still infected. She did a culture which the ENT requested to see what is causing the infections. Apparently we should hear back about the results tomorrow concerning staph, etc. but the fungal infection results take 4 weeks. Um, excuse me. We are looking at a possible fungal infection in my baby's ears? I have never even heard of that.  Apparently it is not likely though. Thank the good Lord.
After we leave the doctor we head on over to the pharmacy to pick up his new prescription as well as Lawson's Prevacid prescription. The only pharmacy in the vicinity that can compound it is The Medicine Shop in Prattville. Luckily I was there anyway. So we got all of that and head to Target to get formula, drop ins, night time diapers, nursery water, baby cereal, and about 10 other things we didn't need. I adore that store!
We leave Target. Then it hits me, I never went back for all of my stuff and I really need to be getting some birthday stuff ready. Last stop, Hobby Lobby, again. Of course my buggy full of stuff had been put back. Great. I started rounding it all back up again but only had 15 minutes until closing time. Garrison, who is sitting in the seat part of the buggy, and I are cruising down the baking aisle grabbing lollipop molds, sticks, chocolate melts, whatever I can get my hands on in a hurry, when all of sudden Garrison starts to projectile vomit. It just kept coming....and coming....and coming. It was like a volcano eruption. Without a thought in my head, I do the typical "form a hand-cup under their mouth" and catch what little I can and start pushing the buggy towards the bathroom with my hip. There is a small break in the eruption which I use to try to find an employee to inform them of the situation since they are constantly announcing "Hobby Lobby is now closed" over the speakers. I am zooming towards the back while hollering "Excuse me. Anybody?" Then it starts again, a steady stream of throw up that douses me, him, the buggy, and the floor. I have all but given up on even trying to catch it. There is no hope. About that time I come across a man. He informs me that Hobby Lobby is closed. Umm, yeah, I got the memo. Apparently he is not too observant because he fails to recognize the fact that we, as well as the buggy and floor, are covered in puke. So, I tell him, "Yeah, I know but my baby just threw up all over and I need to go to the bathroom to clean him up." Ah ha! I see the light bulb come on. Now he sees it. He replies that these things happen with kids and to go ahead. Thank you, Captain Obvious. I inform him that there is quite a trail behind us, up one aisle and down the other. I can practically see the steam coming out of his ears.  It was bad.

I finally make it to the bathroom where I start cleaning us up. First thing's first, un-cup my hands. EW! While I am undressing him a lady employee walks into the bathroom. Guess what her first remark is. "Did you know the store is closed?", with an accusing tone in her voice, like I planned to just spend the night there. I mean, did she think I had just been in the bathroom for the last 45 minutes of announcements? "Attention Customers: Hobby Lobby will close in 30 minutes....20 minutes....15...10..Please bring your final purchases to the front....5....2...All customers come to the front (I am pretty sure that one was addressed directly at me)...Hobby Lobby is now closed."
 I tell her the whole ordeal. Apparently the fact that I still had throw up on me, Garrison was naked, and the shopping cart was still covered did not give this away. I finally get myself cleaned off as well as the buggy. Garrison was a different story though. I had left the extra change of clothes that I always take with me in the car. Seriously?
I head out of the bathroom with a naked-except-for-a-diaper Garrison buckled into a newly clean shopping cart with a set of throw up clothes in the back . Who should I meet upon exiting the restroom? Yet another young Hobby Lobby employee who informs me that the store is closed and apologizes for it. Yeah, believe me, I know. A young girl unlocks the front door for me and proceeds to follow  me to my car to retrieve the lone buggy from me. She stands there as I unlock, unload Garrison and my purse and get him situated, then takes the buggy back inside. Awkward....Needless to say, I still didn't get to buy one single thing I went to Hobby Lobby for.
I bet if you walked into the Employee Lounge of the Hobby Lobby in Prattville you would find a Most Wanted poster with a picture of me on it and a Reward. They all hated me. I was the Mom whose baby puked all over the store after closing, which means they all had to stay late. Oh, did I forget to mention that while I was cleaning Garrison up I kept just throwing toilet paper into the toilet and when I went to flush it was stopped up and overflowed? Yeah, it's true.
That probably resulted in the addition of  "Wanted Dead or Alive....Preferably Dead" to the wanted poster.

On the way home poor Garrison threw up a couple more times. I had to keep pulling over and cleaning him up. It was the worst trip home ever. Well, in truth, it ranked pretty high up there anyway. It is not the first time we have done that, either. It also took forever to get home.
By the time I got home, I really, really wanted to just crash. But as I mentioned earlier, there is no rest for the weary (or the wicked as that song says, which may seem more fitting to all those poor Hobby Lobby folks)

I did get to go to Starbucks in Target, twice, where the Baristo (is that the female version of barista or did I just make up a word?!) commented on my being there twice and how that much coffee would stunt my growth. While I appreciate his concern, I do believe it may be a little too late to be concerned about that one.
Starbucks White Mocha Frap and Raspberry White Mocha all during the same Target visit.... There is always a silver lining.

My cup runneth over

1 comment:

  1. Shana, please call me the next time you have to make a trip to the doctor alone! I'll ride with you and I'm pretty good at cleaning up kids that get sick along the way!!!
    I love your blog! You make me laugh...even if it wasn't funny at the time!